Thread
@LonesomeMesa Did a short thread on malignant narcissism and , having been married to one for 14 years, I wanted to offer my experience and tie it to the left’s institutional narcissism.
The ex was a very good looking man and knew it and being a narcissist, he was extremely vain.
We lived in a wealthy suburb of DC and belonged to the Bethesda Sport and Health Club. Most members had WAY more $ than we did and the ex spent much time cultivating Relationships
1.
The mother was an alcoholic who let the two girls run wild. She told the ex she was done with him and moved in her boyfriend p, who we later discovered molested at least the oldest daughter.
During the time she lived with us, he spent almost every waking hour at the health club (vanity and wanting to not miss anything).
He had one friend who didn’t like me. That was because he was an arrogant prick and he knew I saw right through him. I liked his girl who was 8 yrs older than him.
3.
He treated this girl like crap and yelled at her if she gained 2 pounds or didn’t have her makeup perfect. He was an ass. Every.single.time we went to dinner with them, he would send back his food so he would get the meal comped. We ate at expensive places like Lion D’or and Jacqueline because that is what these rich kids did.
So the ex desperately wanted to be in with the in crowd and the ahole started actively trying to break us up. He broke up w his girl and wanted the ex to come play
4.
With him which he did. So the jerk would tell the ex I said this or that. Doesn’t matter what because my ahole would believe the other ahole.
On the home front, the daughter wanted to keep running wild but I explained we had rules and she kept hating me.
So the ahole would lie about me to the ex and the step daughter would tell him I yelled at her and hit her, none of which was true. And the sickening thing is he believed them.
Reagan was President then and I began to notice
5.
The cancer of liberalism more and more every day. In DC, the TV stations are politics 24/7 so just living there, you are indoctrinated by TV, Radio, friends and family to be liberal.
My ex’s desperate need to be liked by these rich kids he wished he was, ended up with me rejecting everything that he was and they were. A conservative was born.
Back in the 80’s in DC, virtue signaling had just started to become a thing. It started, near as I can tell, with these scions of inherited money
6.
Trying to one up each other on how great they were, how caring and compassionate.
Meanwhile at home, the other daughter moved in at age 15. The oldest was a senior in HS and she told us that the step dad molested her. The kid was also a narcissist and i had caught her in many, many lies for years. So I’m not quite sure she was telling the truth.
The ex’s mother was also an alcoholic and also a narcissist. She sold advertising for the Green Book, which is THE society magazine &
7.
You have to be invited to join AND pay big $. So she was always name dropping and letting everyone know she worked for the Green Book.
She was the very definition of DC liberal.
I studied her and I studied the rich kids and spouses (most got married in elaborate ceremonies). I quickly determined that 5hey were all phonies trying to one up each other in many ways, big and small.
The small ways drove me insane because it was so vacuous I couldn’t believe they couldn’t hear
8.
Themselves talking! They were all fakes and not people I wanted anything to do with. And I had started to despise my ex.
I took a look around my life and at that time I had a great job, making great money but his friends were not my friends and I wanted nothing to do with any of them.
So I told him I was leaving, got a job in FL and never looked back.
FL was a huge culture shock to me. Watching local news was about purse snatchings and car accidents, not politics. It took
9.
Me a few years to de-propagandize myself. The people I met and became friends with were nothing like the vapid rich kids my ex hung out with. He never realized that he would always be the odd man out because his father wasn’t a millionaire.
After living here for 5 years or so, I looked back on that time as an instructive learning experience. I became an out of the closet conservative.
I saw first hand what liberalism does to otherwise intelligent people. They chase after the shiny
10.
Virtue signaling object in order to one up their “friends” and to feel good about themselves because they really have Nothing else. The wives play tennis at the Chevy Chase Club and write checks to various charities and they feel oh so good about themselves, not realizing it’s a trap they can never escape.
I’m sure that if I’d managed to stay in my marriage, I would have been ostracized and ignored by his friends. I guess the point of this thread is to illustrate how empty
11.
Liberal lives are. The cancer of liberalism has consumed MD and VA and unless the less urban parts of those states push back harder, it will only get worse.
The ex remarried. God help his wife.
The eldest kid got married, went to work for her father then had a fight with him and packed up everything and moved to Seattle where she knew no one. She burned all her bridges in DC. None of her friends will talk to her. She has fits of pathological rage and the objects of that don’t hang around. 12
@MadBeachBimbo Glad you wrote it. It's an interesting story. I moved to FL 15 years ago but for the weather. I went to college in DC so I recognize your experience.
@Joycevor DC is and has been a cesspool for decades. I am so glad I live in the free state of FL.
Thank you for sharing this. I lived in DC for 90% of my career life and I was, in many ways, the embodiment of the swamp.
I left for FL after Trump got elected because I sensed what was going to happen to conservatives and/or white people there (I'm not white).
Like Cassandra the Greek goddess for a brief time I had the power of prophecy but the curse of never being believed.
Now I'm having a hard time sympathizing with all the white D voters who didn't believe me.
@epluribustrump Indeed it is a cesspool of group think. And if you don’t think like them, they keep after you and after you until you lie to get them off your back.
Given my background (immigrant, California for college, gay, poor) I was a Dem voter for years after I became a citizen.
9/11 changed EVERYTHING for me.
In 2004 I was all set to vote for GWB and was talked out of it by a successful woman I respected professionally and personally.
You can guess her ethnicity.
Years later I found out she was an Obama foot soldier and a communist.
I have never felt so betrayed in my life.
Communists betray. It's in the DNA.
It doesn't even have to be money. The academic/power snobbery is maybe even worse.
When I lived there I had nice friends but the elitism would inevitably rear its ugly head.
The truly nicest people were those not involved in government, law or academia.
@athena12 Exactly. I was an IT professional and I unfortunately had to rub elbows with all the bureaucrats, lawyers and lobbyists.
Glad to be gone.
@MadBeachBimbo
I'm very sorry you had to experience that horrible way of life, but you were smart enough to get the hell out. Your story makes me very grateful that I married a conservative man with common sense and we live a very peaceful middle class life in GA. So glad you got out and started living a much better life.
@Beelover1972 thanks Tina. It took me long enough to figure it out. And I am married to a wonderful conservative man who also is a professional guitar player so I get my music fix with no weirdo liberals.
@MadBeachBimbo
Yay!!
@MadBeachBimbo
Very cathartic for you to tell your story. You are fortunate to get out whole. God bless you.
@MadBeachBimbo
I’m so glad you said END or I would have been waiting. I hate breaking people’s threads.
@KodiakIsland thanks, it was a great purge of the rage I feel for liberals. I’m glad I have common sense otherwise I would still be there watching him tilt at windmills.
@MadBeachBimbo
I wouldn’t live in DC for all the money in the world.
There are some things $$ can’t buy! Like peace of mind, perceptions of reality, thoughtfulness, sense of humor, happiness, etc
Ive known some phonies in my time BUT nothing like the ppl mad Beach bimbo mentioned. The difference w/my phonies—they weren’t rich like the ppl mentioned in this thread. They had good jobs & made decent $$ but lived far above their means keeping up w/the Jones’s. They were debt ridden wannabes trying to give the perception they were rich
@MarcusJ65 @MadBeachBimbo
I have too! I love my simple, full life in the wilds of Alaska. 🦅
@KodiakIsland I want to visit Alaska so much. My problem is I am old and I despise the cold, as does my old body. I’d thought about a cruise but I would rather go somewhere and just stay and do day trips. Kodiak Island would be paradise for me as I am a real bird person. When is the warmest time? I can handle 50’s in day but not every day.
@MarcusJ65 I didn’t include it in my thread but we were like the fish that follow whales around eating the parasites from them. Not me, him. He so wanted what they had. He tried and tried to spend money we didn’t have. I caved once and allowed him to buy a timeshare for 6k. There are people like them everywhere. The rich ones were even worse than the working class ones because they thought their money made them far and away more virtuous.
@MadBeachBimbo Thank you for sharing your story. I am happy you were able to get away from all that drama. How sad for the others you left behind. It sounds like they could have really benefited from your wisdom.
Many call liberalism a disease. I personally believe it's evil. I pray for their eyes to be opened and their hearts softened so they can one day be a success story like you.
@MzBhaven1 Liberalism is really like cancer. It’s a silent killer. By the time you know you have it, it’s probably too late. That’s what we are faced with. Generations of people who believe the MSM.
@MadBeachBimbo It's tough breaking through all the programming. But, I believe every life is worth it. Been working on my niece for over a decade now. Though it may not be apparent, some has gotten through.
@MzBhaven1 Keep it up. It’s hard but worth it.
Don't be sorry for ``going on and on''.
These details give us a better image of these difficulties you unfortunately have been through, and which you have told illuminatingly and beautifully.
Thank you for sharing your experience from the lion's den. It sounds very harsh.
But it seems that you ultimately came out of there strengthened, so good for you and I'm happy for you 🙂
@Zemeliko Thank you for the kind words. It was a tough time but G-d has blessed me with a wonderful husband and great friends here in the free state of FL.
@YMKYMFOI Wow, I’m going to study this more but I think you’ve hit the nail on the head.
@MadBeachBimbo Big hugs. Glad you had the strength to remove yourself from this awful situation and find your true life.
@oystergirl Thanks. I didn’t realize it when I left but after a couple years of being away from it, it was like a neon blinking sign.
Thank you for your story. I couldn’t stop reading it. My nephew lives in Laurel MD and is surrounded by rabid liberals. He and his significant other blocked me 4 years ago on Facebook because of my support for Trump. He’s really (or I thought) a level-headed guy that loves his family and family traditions but he’s around his liberal friends more so that’s who influences him. It’s sad because it IS a disease. I just can’t be around people like that! You can’t talk to them. Thanks
@Annasmom22 It’s true that people who live in the midst of the liberal insanity cannot see it because it will cause them to have to look at their lives critically. And liberalism destroys critical thinking. Don’t give up. He may come aro7nd.
@MadBeachBimbo Thanks for sharing. I get it, too. After growing up 30 miles from DC, I left for Austin, Texas. When Austin became to left, I headed an hour north. I'm tired of running from destruction and will fight to keep the sanity.
Same, moved to Va from Pa as a child and grew up in Northern, Va. It is the swamp in every way.
@dpalen I’m so sorry to hear this. It’s very hard to deal with when a child has the cancer of liberalism. You can only pray.
@MadBeachBimbo thanks for this. That was fascinating. Vacuous is the perfect description of these people. Scratch their surface, and there is little to nothing underneath.
@Lovemylife Scratch the surface and you see the plastic doll underneath,
@haithabu That’s it exactly. They are all busy trying to outdo each other with virtue signaling and in the process, they lose themselves in a mirage.
I was listening to Sam Vaknin on Youtube (Thomas had recommended him) and he talks about how a narcissist has almost another personality that is a front, and the real person gets lost and denied.
@Lisa22 The ex at first had a sweet side which he buried further and further until all I could see was a big, vain ahole.
@MadBeachBimbo Thank you for sharing. You are making me want to move to Florida!!! :)
@Oo It’s a great place. Great Governor, great weather and no state income tax AND we have a budget surplus.
@MadBeachBimbo Oh, and I really want to hear the navy story!
@Lovemylife I will tell that one next week sometime. It’s pretty hilarious.
@MadBeachBimbo thank you for this transparency...
What a blessing to see it, realize it, AND GET OUT
He made friends with younger men (in their late 20’s, he was nearing 40). We would go to dinner, to see shows and special occasions like weddings etc. The opinion of these 4-5 guys was so important to him, he wouldn’t tell any of them I lived in Takoma Park, a not wealthy suburb. We finally got married and he STILL never told anyone where I’d once lived.
Then the first of his children moved in. She was 15 and hated me, the evil step mother. She was a latch key kid.
2.